My Mail Order Prince!
by mimsiechan
Summary: Every girl dreams of a prince that will sweep her off her feet and defend her to the ends of the earth. In reality, however, can a prince even hope to survive in this day and time?


**Once Upon a Time...**

You know how people always wish they had a 'prince'? Some gallant, handsome guy who would defend you at all costs and play romantic with you? Who would write poetry and sing songs for you, come rushing in on a tall white horse? The kind of guy you never find in real life, no matter how much you search?

Well, have you ever thought about what a prince would be like in the real world? How could a man like that survive? Is it not surprising that there are no more princes in the world? Well, except for—

"Um…Miss Lady Ma'am?" His face, pulled into a confused frown, is like chiseled marble, even when upset. His bangs fall right in front of his face, and I am drawn to the deep green of his eyes, which are so big and beautiful on his face, perfect and—

"Miss…?" He asks again, while I am admiring him. I start.

"Oh! Um. Yes?" I ask, shaking my head to clear it.

"I'm really sorry, Miss, but I think I've—" He doesn't finish, as it is then that I walk into my apartment and notice the fact that it has been completely torn apart by someone.

I close my eyes and curse the gods of online shopping.

Originally, it had been Mio's idea. She'd burst into the coffeehouse where I worked on the side of my editing job, attacking me with a hug and a grin.

"Kita! Kita! Look at this!" A bright orange flyer was shoved into my face, and I burned my hand with the coffee that spilled over as I attempted to wrench it off my face.

"Wha—?"

"Look at it, look at it! Then order me one!" I just stared at Mio for a minute, then set the coffeepot, slowly wiping off the coffee that had spilled. Then I looked at the flyer, as Mio grinned.

_Have the prince you've always dreamed of! Our no fuss, easy order prince selection and shipping system will leave you with the fairytale ending you've always wanted!_

_Just visit us at _

I stared at the flyer for a minute, the text telling me to 'order now!' and that I 'wouldn't regret it!' Mio shifted impatiently from foot to foot.

"Well?" She finally burst, grabbing my hands.

"This is…"I said, to clarify, "…an…"

"Mail-order prince!" She nodded, "And I want one!" I stared at her skeptically for a minute.

"And you're telling me this because…"

"I'm a starving writer, Kita! I have no money! I have no money because I'm not writing. And I'm not writing because I have no prince! And I don't have a prince because I have no money! So, Kita, it is your duty as my editor to buy me a prince and end this cycle once and for all!" Mio finished dramatically.

"Oh." I said, setting the flyer down and picking the coffeepot back up, "No." I turned to go, but Mio stood in my path, a pout on her face.

"Why nooottttt?" She whined, her lower lip jutting out.

"You're getting that chapter done anyways, Mio. Prince or no prince."

"But he'll be my muse!"

"You have plenty of muses."

"They went on vacation!"

"_Mio_."

"Please, Kita? _Please_? At least think about it!" I sighed, as she held out the flyer with both hands at me once again.

"Just think about it?" I stared at the bright orange paper intently, trying to burn a hole in it. Then, finally, I took it from her.

"I'll…think about it." Instantly, Mio was her old cheerful self again.

"Yay! Kita'll think about it!"

"But if I do it, you owe me a chapter a day for a month."

"Awwww!"

"Do you want your prince?"

"Does this mean you'll do it?"

"I said I'd think about it!"

I decided it wouldn't hurt to look at the website. Looking wouldn't hurt. So I cooked up a bowl of ramen, pulled up a chair, turned on my laptop, and typed in the URL. The first thing I noticed was that everything was written in cursive. The kind of fine, elegant font you only saw on wedding invitations. The kind of font I could just barely make out. However, I sighed and plowed on.

From what I gathered, you were supposed to select what kind of qualities you wanted in a prince. Tall or short. Cold and aloof or warm and caring. You could specify his hair color, his eye color, anything you could think of! I could see how Mio, a rabid fan of the idea of the perfect prince, had been so excited to find this site.

I scrolled through some of the satisfied customer comments—all by girls, of course—before clicking the 'Order Now!' page. I'd just give it a try. In harmless fun. I preferred a polite, shy prince. Height wasn't an issue here, considering I hadn't grown much since high school, but I made sure to have him tower over me anyways. Dark haired, green-eyed. I'd always had a thing for green eyes. And although they would look out of place with his Asian appearance…well, it just made him all the more exotic. By the time I got to the bottom of the page, I had customized almost everything about this man to the exact way I wanted it, to the point where I was starting to doubt this man, if he was just that, would even be real. My mouse hovered over the 'Checkout!' button, then moved away. Then, I sighed, picking up my phone. If this didn't work out, Mio was going to owe me _two_ chapters a day.

"Hello?"

"…You're supposed to be writing!" I heard Mio almost drop the phone, as she scrambled to turn off the sound of the game that I knew was playing in the background, "I heard that."

"It's inspirational music! I swear it is!"

"Mmhm. Sure it is. What song was it?"

"Tong Hua!" Fairytale. Fitting, considering what I was about to tell her.

"Mmmhm. Well, anyways, Mio. I took a look at the website."

"You did?!" Her voice was shrill in my ear, completely full of excitement.

"Yep, and I'm ordering one. Which means—" The rest of the sentence was cut off by Mio's happy shrieks.

"YAY! I TOLD YOU, KITA! I KNEW I'D CONVERT YOU!" She continued to scream.

"Yes, yes. Now hurry up and tell me what kind of prince you want before I decide that I only want to order one tonight." That shut her up quick enough, before she rattled out statistics so quickly that I knew she had been looking at this for weeks. Oh well. Anything to keep my writer happy.


End file.
